Monday, December 30, 2013

Resolution Virgin

When discussing the upcoming year with family, friends, coworkers, etc ... it never fails to fall on the topic of resolutions.  People stating what they are making their new year resolutions and their detailed plans of how to accomplish them.  In previous years, I have never made resolutions.  I joke about them but never seriously set any resolutions for myself.  I feel that at some point ... if we want to change something in our lives or about ourselves then we will simply do exactly that and to set a specific date (one that is the same start date as other people in general) is setting up for epic fail.  Who wants to be cliche' right?  Obviously not me.  But then again, if you ask either of my parents they will tell that during my "growing up" years (which I am still in by the way), that I am anything but cliche'.  So ... this is a new year and a new beginning to this thing you people call resolutions.  Because look out 2014 ... I am joining in the "fun".  You heard me.  I am making resolutions for myself, but with a catch.  Yes I said a catch.  They have to be doable. They have to be believable (for myself, I don't need any of you to believe in them lol).  AND, they have to be something that I truly want and need for myself.

So ... here are my resolutions to break my cycle of non-conforming.

  1)  Eat Clean.

This in no way means that I am dieting.  Nope.  If I say I am dieting I will fail.  If I say I am losing so many pounds I will get frustrated and give up and fail.  I am EATING CLEAN.  I see my daughter do this every single day with her Celiac Disease (which I will delve into in another blog on another day).  I see her determination to feel good and eat right.  I am joining the Lexi bandwagon and eating clean.  

  2)  Be More Active.

This in no way means that I am stating I will work out so many days a week and for so many minutes a day.  Nope.  If I say I am doing those things I will fail.  Life is busy.  My life is busy.  I cannot possibly schedule in anything else and be faithful to it.  Especially something like "Zumba every Mon, Tue, Thur for thirty minutes".  I will fail.  So, I am going to be more active.  The kids and I love to jam out to music in the house.  I am going to start dancing in the living room more with them.  I am going to start parking further from the doorways to stores so I have to walk a little more.  You catch my idea here?  Be more active.  If I want to work out.  I will.  If I want to go for a run.  I will.  No scheduling.  Just promising to be more active.  

  3)  Write More.

I love to write.  Always have.  I started out writing poetry when my friends were keeping diaries.  Just ask a few of them from junior high.  They would beg me to write love poems for them to give their crushes.  No joke.  I continued writing poetry up until about five years ago.  I used to write stories hoping that one day it would turn into a page turner that some people would absolutely hate and others would appreciate.  Nothing to make me famous.  Just to put my words on the map.  So ... this blog is my new beginning to that resolution.  Write more.  Poetry, quotes in a notebook, stories, scripture readings ... whatever it is.  I am writing that stuff down. 

  4)  Be A Better Mom

Nothing in particular here needs to be said.  I just always want to be better tomorrow than I am today with these precious gifts that God blessed me with.  They are my entire universe.  They are the best kids in all the land because they are little pieces of me and they are so much better than I ever imagined being at their ages.  I want to be able to be the best mom they could ever imagine in return.  That simple.

  5)  Less Inner Irritations.

I know this sounds ridiculous to some of you and to others it is completely understood without reading this paragraph explaining myself.  Life is chaotic for all of us.  However if my college degree has taught me nothing else it is that people can experience the exact same thing and behave and react differently to it.  So DO NOT judge me for this resolution. I am not ugly.  I am not mean.  I do not yell at everyone.  But I find myself struggling internally with irritation after long hard days.  If you know me I am a complete overachiever.  I am a nerd.  I will have earned three degrees in four years this coming March when I graduate.  Then, after a seven week break, I will be jumping right back in for another two year stint to get the one degree I have been working so hard towards.  So, sometimes my brain and my heart decide to disagree and yes, my inner angel/demon shoulder sitters become very irritable with each other and it gives me a stressful headache.  So ... long story short, no more of that crap.  No more irritating headaches due to stress.  

  6)  Dance More With Friends.

My crew knows who they are.  We have all typically gotten together since I have been blessed with these amazing women, once a year for some form of bdaypalooza or even been blessed with a wedding or two.  But, life gets busy, schedules with kiddos gets complicated, etc.  So, this is less of a resolution and more of a promise to myself to make it happen.  Gotta have my crew time.  

  7)  Worry Less.  Let God More.

If you know me you know where my heart has been for the past few years and how it struggles to understand a lot of what my eyes see and my ears hear.  I was telling a friend today, actually, that I have needed and craved something to speak to my soul so that my heart and head would simmer down.  She had shared part of a sermon she heard Sunday and it really sparked something I needed to hear.  "The thing you thought was going to kill you, God wants to redeem for His glory and someone else's future."  ...  "Sometimes God sends us into a storm, they are not all from the devil, so we can see His miracles take place."  ... AND THEN THE BIG ONE, "If you are having issues whether it is relationship, financial, etc ... and you feel the need to constantly ask God for a miracle, you are having management issues NOT miracle issues."  Wow.  Thank you Callie for that share of information because I heard them loud and clear.  And thank you God for using Callie to share those words because I needed them to be a screaming force in my ears.  I know God is in control and that God takes good care of His girls.  Now I need to work harder at allowing him to be jealous of me and to take care of me.  Big Daddy's Got This!  

  8)  Time Management.

  9)  Time Management.

Yup, you guessed it.  Double the resolution on that one.  (haha)

That is it.  Only 10 little resolutions (aka promises to myself).  FYI, on that pesky #5 I appreciate all prayers.  Just sayin' ... I am not perfect.